**The Dangers of ‘Future-Faking’ in Relationships: How to Spot and Avoid It**
Partners who engage in future-faking should be left in the past. Los Angeles-based psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula recently shed light on this toxic manipulation tactic used by narcissists in romantic relationships.
Identifying Future-Faking
In a YouTube video, Dr. Durvasula issued a stark warning about future-faking, emphasizing that this behavior involves making promises with no genuine intention of fulfilling them. She clarified that future-faking isn’t merely discussing hopeful future plans but rather a deceptive ploy to extract something from the partner based on false promises.
According to Dr. Durvasula, future-fakers leverage promises of a better future to keep their partners in the relationship or gain personal benefits like adoration or status. An example she cited was a narcissistic individual promising a partner a bigger house in the future in exchange for financial sacrifices in the present.
The Consequences of Future-Faking
Dr. Durvasula highlighted the dire consequences of falling victim to future-faking, describing it as an “utter tragedy” for those ensnared in narcissistic relationships. She cautioned that promises of growing old together made by narcissists are often empty gestures, leading to one partner being burdened with caregiving responsibilities in the long run.
The psychologist shared insights from her extensive experience working with individuals trapped in long-term narcissistic relationships, spanning decades. She pointed out that many people in their 40s and older may have unknowingly endured toxic dynamics due to a lack of awareness around narcissism in the past.
A Cautionary Tale
Dr. Durvasula issued a poignant reminder that narcissistic individuals are unlikely to provide care for their partners as they age, despite their assurances. She painted a grim picture of the potential scenario where one’s health deteriorates, leaving them reliant on a self-centered partner for support, a situation that can be emotionally and physically taxing.
Ultimately, Dr. Durvasula urged individuals to be vigilant in identifying future-faking behaviors in their relationships and to prioritize their well-being over false promises. Recognizing the signs of manipulation early on can help individuals avoid falling into the trap of toxic relationships, safeguarding their mental and emotional health in the process.