Dear Abby ain’t no stranger to doling out advice to folks in need, and this time around, she’s helping out a woman who’s been dealing with quite the load in her marriage. This lady has been hitched for a solid decade to a man from another country, and let’s just say it’s been a bumpy ride. See, for the past six years, she’s been the one bringing home the bacon ’cause her fella couldn’t legally work. To top it all off, she’s been on the receiving end of some not-so-pleasant treatment from him, including verbal, emotional, and even a touch of physical abuse. Yikes.
Things hit a breaking point when her hubby threw a fit in public over their crying toddler and ended up breaking his fishing pole in a rage. After she called him out for acting like a child, he threatened her with more childish behavior once they got home. Needless to say, she packed up the kiddo and moved in with her mom for half a year. Now, the husband seems to be getting some help for his issues and wants another shot at making things right. But our gal is torn between giving him a chance or walking away, especially since she doesn’t want her child thinking that abuse is ever okay. Tough spot, huh?
Abby’s advice? Before making any big decisions, she suggests making sure the hubby is actually getting the help he claims to be getting. Maybe tag along to a therapy session or two to see for yourself. And hey, if you do decide to stick it out, it might even benefit both of you in the long run. Communication and trust are key, after all.
Moving on to another dilemma, this reader’s been buddies with a gal since their junior high days, but things have taken a sour turn with her friend’s hubby. Turns out, when they come over for a visit, the guy’s all about drinking up the booze and not really showing any appreciation. No offers to take them out or even grab breakfast together. Talk about feeling used, right? So, our reader’s wondering how to break the news that they’re not up for hosting them anymore. Tricky situation, indeed.
Abby’s got a simple solution for this one. Next time the friend reaches out to plan a visit, just say it’s not a good time or that you’ve already got plans. Suggest they book a room at a fancy hotel instead. Chances are, they might not be too keen on that idea and back off. Repeat as needed until they get the hint. Sometimes you gotta put yourself first, even if it means setting some boundaries with old pals.
